The Game

"You've got to be kidding. Hopscotch?" I couldn't believe it. He made it sound like such a hard, new game that he made up...and yet this was a common one. There must be a catch. There was always a catch with him. Hyde. I wondered...was there a Jekyll somewhere in there?

Hyde looked shocked, as if I had said some blasphemy that went against all his beliefs. "This game is more complicated than an intense game of rock-paper-scissors! If you want, though, we can play that first." He then took out two rocks, a piece of paper (which he ripped in half), and two pairs of scissors. Tossing one of each to me, he said, "Okay, we'll each get one minute. Ready? GO!"

A minute? To choose between these three? There had to be a catch. I picked up the rock that had been thrown to me and held it in my hands. The time seemed to pass slowly. Then...I realized something. I shouldn't have thought of it, but the idea stuck in my head. It stood in front of me like a deer in headlights. I had a rock. In my hand. It was a rather large rock. Sharp at one hand, but round on the other. I quietly walked up behind him. I raised the rock high, prepared to strike...

"HEY! THAT'S CHEATING!" He turned around instantly, pushed me against the other wall, and continued to yell at me. "You CAN'T look at the other person until the minute it UP! CHEATER!" I stood there, dazzled at this response. I figured he had probably seen the rock in my hand, so I switched it for some scissors. Some very sharp scissors. No! I wouldn't try again - it would only result in the same way.

The minute was up, and I stood holding my scissors. I turned around, holding my scissors. "Okay, the minute's up," I said, "Turn around and let's see who won." He turned around. What he held in his hand was not at all what I suspected - he had used the scissors to carve a face of (presumably) someone he hated, as the scissors were shoved in the forehead. The paper was used as a hat of some sort.

When he looked at my scissors, he said "Oh, no, you played it wrong. I guess you lose."

"WHAT?! You didn't even tell me the rules! I figured it was like rock-paper-scissors!" This was ludicrous. The game he played wasn't anything like traditional good ol' fashioned "rock-paper-scissors".

"What are you talking about? Rock-paper-scissors: use the paper and scissors to carve the rock and create a sculpture!"

"You can't use scissors to carve a rock!"

"I did!" He got me there. I stood silently, amazed at this work of 'art' he had created. I couldn't believe it. Hyde was more than insane, he was cruel.

"Alright, then, let's play hopscotch," I didn't know why I was agreeing to play the game...at that point, though, hopscotch (or whatever demented form of it he had in his mind) was my only way out. "I'm going to win and get out of here."

"Wait, what?" He seemed thoroughly confused.

"What do you mean, 'Wait, what?'" I don't know why I was surprised. It's not like weirder things haven't happened. I doubt if I'd ever get out. I'd rot here forever, most likely.

"What's this hopscotch you speak of? I remember nothing of this deal," His posture changed yet again to reflect an intelligent man who was aware of all his past actions. Sigh. I wasn't getting anywhere. I slapped him.

"Yo, foo'! You can't slap me and get away wid it! You goin' down, boy!" I slapped him again. "NEIN! ICH BEN LEIBEN! I'M NOT GERMAN! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!" This time I punched him. "You want to play a game, do you? I have a game. It's called 'Run Out of the Building Before it Explodes'!" He pulled out some sort of device and hit a large red button. Over a loudspeaker system that seemed to have been installed, the words "2 minutes until self destruct sequence," rang out like daggers in me.