Language

For those of you who didn't realize it (which was apparently all of you)...the cooking installment was a look into the insane man's mind. Onward!

"YOU! How...why...no! WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME?"

He stood calmly and smiled. "We are not the enemy."

"THEN LEAVE ME ALONE! LET ME BE! I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR GOLDFISH, OR YOUR SOCKS, O-"

Fadeout.

Fade in slowly throughout the following: Blurry camera in a dark room. Pan left, then right, then forward. Blinding light appears, camera jerks away back towards dark. Camera pans slowly towards menacing figure. Zoom in on menacing figure's hand, holding plate of food. Camera fades to black.

I was a little dizzy when I awoke. I couldn't see clearly, but I could see that I was in a dark room. I had a headache and a large bump on my head. I turned left, then I turned right. Looking straight forward, what looked like the door opened. A blinding light came through and I jerked my head away. As my eyes adjusted to the light, I turned back slowly. A large menacing figure stood in the path of the light, no doubt the lunatic. I decided then and there I would name him "Mr. Hyde". I saw he held a plate of food. I slowly stood up and edged towards the plate. Suddenly, the light behind him went out suddenly.

"Curses! Foiled again!" Mr. Hyde said. Although I couldn't see him, I could hear that he was looking through a plastic bag he brought. I heard him strike a match and a light emitted from his hand. With his other hand he brought a candle. I wondered where the food was as he threw the match up. It was then I realized that there was a chandelier above me, as the match lit it up. Curiously enough, it turns out that Mr. Hyde is an apt costume-changer, as he was now dressed strangely. He had a mask over his face and his dress was very formal. A picture resembling his attire can be seen below.

It was not what I expected, but I thought...maybe, as a girl, he'll be more willing to let me leave...I decided I'd take the chance and ask him. "Excuse me, Madam, I was wonde-"

"Madam?! I am no Madam, Monsieur!" He spoke with a heavy French accent in a falsetto voice. "Please address me properly, as Sir Isaac Newton." His accent curiously changed to English, and he seemed completely fine with the fact that he was wearing a dress. "Yes, I said Elton John, the famous...dude...where's the beach? And what's with the dress?" I expected the sudden change, but to Hawaiian surfer? What was more shocking was when he ripped off the dress to reveal a swim suit and a surf board was pulled out of the dress. Strange, I know, but not much weirder that I had been exposed to previously.

Suddenly, an idea popped into my head. "I trec.de la will asemănător tu la spre a permite eu drum liber , dacă aceasta este tot right cu tu." I hoped he could understand.

"Ah! Tu speak meu localnic limbaj!" He understood! Yes!

"Tu vei află that as un linguist I speak mulţi variabil limbaj," I responded.

"Kolik jazyk pocínovat tebe mluvit?" Interesting. I hadn't spoken that language in a while.

"Dovedu mluvit více jazyk než tebe." I was a little rusty, but no matter.

"Av , JEG nære tvivl om at. JEG kunne indtale temmelig mange sprogene." Hm. He's good. This was isn't very common.

"Jeg har arbejdede på alle leder og kanter den jord. Lad være skepsis mig." I was confident in my skills. There were very few languages that I didn't know.

"Ísland er a ágætur land , myndað af would not þú samþykkja?"

I paused, cursing at my stupidity.

"Excuse me?"