"The literary equivalent of an acid trip." -jedi_raptor07

Wednesday, October 10, 2007


"Six pieces are all that remain of the artifact. It came in sixteen when we first got it. Well, sixteen plus the box...so it's more like seventeen. But only ten went missing, so I guess we seven, not six..."

The museum curator rambled on with no signs of stopping when a ringing came. The man he was talking to calmly pulled out his cellphone and said "One moment, please, I have to take this call." The poor old man had no sense of what to do and stood awkwardly.

"What? No, it's here. Now? Why not in a half hour? But I wanted a donut first...oh, fine, now will do!" The man closed his cellphone and said "You'll have to excuse me, but your power is about to be cut.

Just as there was light at the dawn of time, so there was darkness in the museum, both in the electrical circuits as well as the museum curator's consciousness. A knock came from somewhere as a rope lowered through an apparent hole in the glass ceiling. Six people, dressed in bright neon green and pink outfits, crawled down the rope and into the dark room. Five beams of light emanated from them.

"Frank, put your flashlight on," one said.

"I told you Alpha, I'm Delta-Squad-Frizzy-Hair-Flex-Boy!"

"I am NOT calling you that, Frank! And my name's not Alpha! Now put your flashlight on!"


The flashlights went out. There was a noise, much like a struggle. A punch was thrown. Many punches were thrown. Some hit the floor. The janitors who cleaned up the mess later mentioned "It was green, like it was bought from a store. Here in our museum, we make our own punch!"

Five beams of light turned on.


There was a whimper, followed by a sixth beam of light.

The man previously on the cellphone walked over to greet the intruders.

"You got the museum curator taken care of?" asked an as of yet indistinguishable character.

"Yup, he's out like a light, " he replied.

"...that's not taken care of, Mr. Shekel," Alpha said while cracking his knuckles. "I know you're new, but when I say "take care of him", I want him put in a room where he can sustain himself for six days. When I say I want him taken care of, I want him taken care of. Your mistake, newcomer, will not go unpunished."

A shot rang out. A body fell to the floor.

"Boss...you missed."

A pause surrounded the room.

"Next time, it will be YOU!"


The next day, the museum's entire staff was crowded around the dinosaur exhibit. Conversation bubbled about the latest heist. The police arrived, and they were immediately escorted to the exhibit. The only clue they had to work with was the shattered ceiling and a note.

Dear Museum,
I hope our intrusion last night did not disturb anyone. We'd like to publicly thank you for the tyrannosaurus rex. Sorry about the ceiling!
Yours Truly,
The Kletzla Foundation


Comments Anonymous Not Maeve said...

A mysterious mystery! I hope there's more to come.

2:05 PM, October 13, 2007

Comments Blogger Sam said...


9:52 PM, October 13, 2007

Comments Blogger rebecca said...

hahaha. What happens next? is what I wanna know.

6:27 PM, October 14, 2007

Comments Blogger nerdjedi said...

The awesomossity of Randomossity abounds....

3:47 PM, October 16, 2007

Comments Blogger Jedi_Raptor07 said...


That was...

What's the word I'm looking for?


3:51 PM, October 16, 2007


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