TIMBER!

Ted was one of the most beloved professors at the college. He taught the extraordinarily popular classes "Blowing Stuff Up 201", "Blowing Bigger Stuff Up 202", and "Blowing Really Big Stuff Up 301". These classes, while dangerous, were by far the most fun in the college, with the only other class that rivaled it in popularity was the "Bowling" class.

Teaching these popular classes required a sense of humor, as nearly blowing up a student (or himself) happens quite often. In fact, more often than not, at least one person is put in severe danger in a single class. This led to many complaints from parents and a "Danger: This Class may Kill You" warning was placed on the class description and the size of the class was reduced to 5 students each.

Ted was not too happy about this, so he blew up the college.

No one was injured; he made sure that he pulled the fire alarm first.

The moral of this story is never to eat a bologna sandwich while flying headfirst into a solution of toxic waste and sharpies.